Ingrid Norsman

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Calling All Collies

If you're a nice big cuddly collie doggie, looking for a nice cosy cuddly home, why not get in touch with cosy cuddly INGRID NORSMAN?

If you're lost around the Cotswolds, Ingrid might be pleased to hear from you. Ingrid is an absolutely bewitching dog-lover. Honestly, some of you galumping great St. Bernards get better treatment from Ingrid than a mislaid pop star in need of his mother.

“What would you rather have for Easter, Ingrid? A famous pop star or a woolly collie?”

“Don't make me laugh, what would do with a pop star? You can take a woolly collie for a lovely ramble. You can't take a pop star anywhere except where the windows are all shut to keep the noise in.”

This is Ingrid.

Cuddly collies, please note.

Span No 212 - April 1972

Helen Milligan

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Helen Brodie (Milligan)

One for all you D.K. fans of the lovely HELEN BRODIE.

Span No 200 - April 1971

Margaret Yeadon

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Haircut, Sir?

If it looks like MARGARET YEADON is fond of the bottle, it's quite misleading. They were studio bottles. Margaret was just posing for the photographer and as he's a bottle man he thought what a background and a foreground, just the flaming ticket, darling.

Margaret is twenty-two, she lives in Leeds, and she has her own men's hairdressing salon. She likes looking after men's styles, and the styles being so way out these days, Margaret can exercise ingenuity, skill and inventiveness. Actually, a haircut isn't on. If you have one you're dead old-fashioned. You have it styled.

And when Margaret isn't styling heads of handsome masculine hair, she's lapping up the excitement at Hot Rod Car meetings.

Span No 212 - April 1972

Marion McGregor

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Oh, On The Bottle, Are We?

Oh, On The Bottle, Are We?

"How dare you?" said MARION McGREGOR.

"We were only coining a phrase to fit the look of things.”

“| only drink fruit juices," said Marion, "they help to keep my measurements static."

"'Whatter?"

"Static, you fool," said Marion, "that means constant."

"What's constant, darling?"

"In my case," said Marion, "constant is 37-23-36. Any other questions?"

"What are you doing tonight, dearest?"

"Washing my hair," said Marion, "and please don't call me dearest at least, not until you've invited me home to meet your mother."

What a cute girl.

She lives in Ayrshire, which is in Scotland, which is full of bonny bunnies, and we've always been pro-Scottish. We like bonny bunnies.

Beautiful Britons No 182 - January 1971

Lisa Scott

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Lost and Found

Candidly, we're always losing things because we don't remember where we put them. Other people lose things because they're careless.

Canadian girl LISA SCOTT, married to a lovely Englishman her own description is neither forgetful nor careless. Well, not normally she isn't. But the other day she had an argument with a traffic warden, and it took the edge off her tidy mind. She couldn't think where she'd put her shopping list, her money, and her book of stamps.

She looked everywhere. She wasn't half cut up about her temporary mental aberration. Goodness, she thought, at twenty-one, is it a sign of old age? No, darling, just the upset condition traffic wardens get people into.

Anyway, all ended on a rapturous note. She found the missing items in the pocket of her car. Not wanting to lose them again, Lisa decided that the traditional lodging place favoured by so many women before stretch tights put paid to it, was her best bet against further loss. So, she tucked the items into the top of her stocking. How pretty.

Beautiful Britons No 174 - May 1970