Pinky Sands

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Learner Farmer

One summer day London dolly PINKY SANDS went down on the farm. She didn't really know what a farm was all about except as a place where cows wandered contentedly about, and farmers' sons chased the milkmaids. She had been a cosmopolitan city girl all her life and she found her days down on the farm all loaded with fresh air and fun.

Now she wants to give up cities and help a nice farmer to grow corn and barley and oats. Well, as she knew a spritely farmer's son, she asked him if his dad would like a willing milkmaid who would also be pleased to plant crops. The farmer's son said, "Never mind about what me dad would like, you're hired, so come and drive the tractor from this field to that one."

So, Pinky had a go with the tractor and drove it into a large field surrounded by trees and then said, "What next?" "This suits me fine," said the farmer's son, "it's a rural cul-de-sac." "Oh, you are saucy," said Pinky, fighting him off, "but it's lots of fun."

Beautiful Britons No 232 - March 1975

Pinky Sands

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Treed

That reminds me, said Parsons during the directors’ lunch break, did I ever tell you about the time I went on a tiger hunt? I was after a fireside rug for Emily, she’d been nagging me about it ever since

Mrs. Gonk next door had knitted herself one. Well, there I was in the jungle with elephants all round me waiting to charge me and squash me flat as soon as I showed the top of my topee. The gun I had could lay a tiger flat but not an elephant, so what did I do? I popped up from the jungle grass like a champagne cork, and a big elephant on my right and a bigger one on my left immediately charged. Just as they reached me I sidestepped, the lumbering brutes met head-on and conked themselves stupid. Aroused by the noise, up trotted a tiger to sniff at me while I stood there all numb and hysterical. Would you believe it, just as the tiger was about to bite me in half a lady tiger whistled, the man tiger turned its head and I clouted it with all I’d got. Emily was ever so pleased. I don’t know what PINKY SANDS is doing up that tree, by the way. She looks absolutely ravishing, but it’s no way to catch a tiger and make a rug.

Pinky Sands

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Gone Fishing

When good old Joe turned up to take PINKY SANDS for a ride on the back of his bike, Pinky was conspicuous by her absence. Good old Joe having been very precise about the time he’d arrive. Pinky had gone fishing. She preferred that to riding on the back of his bike and listening to him talking about his bicycle pump. Pinky got into a little difficulty with her line and hook but it was all a lot more fun than good old Joe.

Pinky Sands

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Perky Pinky

This is another fairy story.

No matter how much television plays seek to befuddle you into believing there’s no such thing as a happy ending and that life for everybody is a lot of old boots, the fact is nice things do happen to people.

Princes and fairy queens and old harpies on broomsticks don’t play such impressive parts as they used to, but nevertheless, take the story off PINKY SANDS.

There she was, sitting home most nights and wondering what to do about life. Nothing fantastic ever seemed to happen and she couldn’t find a great deal of glamour in her typewriter, especially when it came to changing the ribbon.

Then a man who was photographing the bridesmaids at a wedding saw her looking long-legged and lovely among the guests and said, taking his eye off the bridesmaids so that they came out with their heads cut off, “You look like you ought to be a model, go and apply to an agency.”

So Pinky did just that and the agency said what a willowy wonder she was, and now Pinky rents a cosy little flat in town and is long-leggedly engaged in the glamour world of modelling. No wonder she’s perky.