Joan Paul

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Men Only - Joan Paul

I spotted this the other day while listing some books for sale: Joan Paul in the December 1966 issue of Men Only, with the accompanying mumbo jumbo below.

She Wants To Crack The Male Barrier

“Doesn’t every girl want to marry a millionaire?”
Joan Paul had a look that contained the right balance of incredulity and impishness as she put this question.
She was talking about careers at the time. Just to suggest that she was half-joking, Joan added: “Anyway, there are not many young good-looking one available.”

This 22-year-old maid of Kent has lived and worked in London as a secretary for the past year. She has also been a croupier at a London club.
Joan wants to travel and sees her best chance by getting a job as a croupier abroad. But on the Continent, it was pointed out, croupiers are usually men.
"Then I'll just have to break through the male barrier," she retorted.
When Joan talks of travel she has sunny countries in mind. She loves the sun, music-classical and pop-and modern dancing.
Her pet hates? The English weather and tapioca pudding.

Joan Paul

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Good For A Giggle

We know many a girl finds a pair of Long Johns just right for helping her to stave off the goosepimples in the depths of winter, but when you come to look at them, fellers you can’t deny they’re good for a giggle.

In fact, if the comical gentry running the shows at the Pier Theatre during the summer season want to make sure the house splits itself in half from time to time, they’ll always think up a sketch in which the heroine wears Long Johns and is, moreover, seen to be wearing them.

We can’t laugh at JOAN PAUL, though, she’d be ever so upset, and we’ve always been good friends up to now.

Her white Long Johns aren’t her only pair, you know.

Can’t help giggling, can you, really?

Joan Paul

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Rural View

“Hi,” said the man in the green jacket, “I can’t see any pheasants, but I’ve lost interest since I spotted you. Would you like to stay there while I go and change my gun for a camera?”

“I shan’t be here all day,” said JOAN PAUL, “so if you want to snap me, you’d better start running.”

So, the man in the green jacket went off at a trot, but he couldn’t find anyone with a camera who wanted to exchange it for a gun, and there was no alternative in the end but to go and buy one. By the time he returned to photograph the rural view with Joan in the foreground, Joan had gone home. There are other things to do in life besides waiting for a man to go and acquire a camera.

Joan Paul

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Mini-Mania

It’s not something you need go to a psychiatrist about. JOAN PAUL doesn’t, but some people do.

“Rest comfortably on the couch, please. Comfy? Nice and relaxed? Good. Now then, what’s the trouble?”

“I’ve got a mania.’’

“Oh, have you? So have I. I was thinking of going to a psychiatrist about it.” “But you’re a psychiatrist yourself.”

“I can’t help that, we’ve all got our problems. Now about my mania—it comes over me mostly in the park.”

“Excuse me, but I’m the patient, it’s my mania I’ve come to discuss with you, not yours. Look, see that, I’ve got one leg in the air.”

“Is that your mania?”

“No, that’s my cramp. My mania is to do with mini-skirts. The whole thing is a terrible worry to me and I can’t sleep at nights.”

“Why is it such a worry?”

“I keep thinking they’ll go out of fashion. Ouch, there goes my cramp again.”

When one realises just how scintillating Joan is in her mini, one can’t help sympathising with all men who worry about when it will all end.

Joan Paul

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It’s Lovely Here

It was a lovely day and JOAN PAUL found herself a lovely spot. Deep in the heart of Surrey, where the foxes still run. Far from the rushing, hissing, clanking noises of London.

“London is swingy,” said Joan, “but it’s lovely here. I could stay here all day, but foxhounds keep running over my feet and snapping at my feet. I didn’t realise everything was still so primitive. Gadzooks, here’s another bunch and they’re all drooly. James, fetch the car.”

Joan Paul

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Wanted a Dream Boat

Having got over her passion for collecting vintage cars — they all came apart in her hands — JOAN PAUL decided she'd go in for a dreamboat with an outboard.

You don't have to muck about with sails then or get biffed by the boom or something.

So, she advertised for one and a Greek god turned up. Joan took one look at him, went all dizzy and said "Do you have an outboard?"

"I don't need an outboard to get me going” said the Greek god, "I only need encouragement."