ABC of Glamour

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Glamour Girls

A = American

The average American glamour girl lives in a woman’s world but doesn’t actually eat men. She is smart, sophisticated, has long and lovely legs but is succumbing only slowly to the mini skirt. Teeth very good. Goes in for bulk-buying of groceries, keeps her man up with the Astors if she can, never mind the Joneses, has large account with dry-cleaners, makes a wonderful all-American mother, believes in tradition for Europe and plumbing for the United States.

Sex rating: Campus-trained.

Example of long-legged American glamour: ARLENE CHARLES.


B = British

The average British glamour girl is bullied by career women who would like her to actually eat men, but the av. B.G.G. would rather be eaten herself—in the nicest way only, of course. Wears droll hats, mini-skirts, and stockings that give you spots before the eyes. Likes the beach, villas in Spain, gondoliers. Accepts man as boss (much to fury of career women), is coveted as perfect secretary and makes imperfect shopper. Develops into nice but worrying mother.

Sex rating: Sweetly confused.

Example of mini-skirted British galmour: PAT SIMPSON.

C = Continental

The average Continental glamour girl is over-glamorised, puts on weight is endearingly feminine, useless at sport, lovely at chemin- de-fer, dark, short-legged, bikini-mad. Looks great in a convertible, not so great on a horse, enchanting on beach, talkative in crowd, loves to be with men, hates other women. Wants to be a James Bond girl—the one he seduces, not the one he bumps off.

Sex rating: Incurable.

Example of Bikini clad glamour: KATHLEEN TRENTINI.

Minuit Cinq

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No 11

Susan Douglas

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We Have To

Everytime we omit to include SUSAN DOUGLAS in any of our issues, her fans rise up and write angry letters to us. Many of these letters describe our letdown of their expectations as a despicable campaign in favour of the indescribable dregs, whatever that may mean. This never fails to make trouble— someone has to carry the can. And Susan’s fans are entitled to that much. We do feature her very regularly. We have to. They’d tear the place down brick by brick otherwise.

We’d feel all exposed if we had to carry on with only the rubble around us. You can’t tear a place down and put it up again overnight. And even if you could, what would the unions say?

Ben's Books

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Ladies No 12

Carol Burdette

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Well Caught

CAROL BURDETTE, was well caught by the old farm gate and the farmer’s boy was so smitten he went off his sandwiches.

Ben's Books

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Hit No 6

Bobby Shaw

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Some are Wonderful others are Beautiful

You’ve heard about the London Bobbies. It’s traditional for every visitor to say how wonderful they are. Occasionally they kind of let you down by nicking you for a traffic offence, but you can take it happily when they pat you on the head and see you on your way with their own inimitable cheer—“No hard feelings, sir, see you in court.”

There are other Bobbies in London, of course. There are quite beautiful ones like BOBBY SHAW, who is an absolute dreamboat at creating exquisite floral decorations. The only thing more exquisite is Bobby herself. In a sports car she’s more decorative than a cluster of orchids and as she rides by you go weak at the knees with the magnitude of your appreciation. Old ladies naturally think you’ve been drinking and next thing you know a kindly member of Alcoholics Anonymous is asking in the friendliest way if you’d like to be cured.

Cured?

What, and let all the beautiful Bobbies of London pass by without stirring those unforgettable deep-down pangs of appreciative anguish?

It’s all right, friend, just let me lie here.

Ben's Books

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Girly No 11

Helen Williams

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There Was Once Another

This is HELEN WILLIAMS, Chelsea model who’s absolutely with it when it comes to trendy gear.

Long before your time, Christopher, there was once another Helen, and a piece of Trojan beefcake called Paris was so smitten with her blue eyes and her way of walking across a room that he picked her up and carried her off. All the way from Greece to Troy. Her husband, who also liked her blue eyes and her way of walking, nearly did his classical nut. Gathering up Acnilles, Ajax, Ulysses and divers other Grecian muscle men, he sailed for Troy to rescue his fair bride. You know the rest. Ten years of unlimited gore and then the wooden horse. It’s past history now and there are other things to do, like getting home in time to watch “The Avengers.” Or going to Chelsea on a Sunday to watch all the trendy young tilings in mini-skirts as they discuss philosophy and Himalayan cooking under the trees.

Look out for Helen. Now you’ve seen her you can’t miss her. She’s got blue eyes too and the way she walks gets us going all down the side.

Ben's Books

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Strip Lingerie No 8

Liz McEwen and Jennie McEwen

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How To Like Your Sister

Well, as LIZ McEWEN was telling her friend Lynda on the phone, it’s easy if your sister doesn’t mind you borrowing her record player and doesn’t yell her head off if she finds you’ve also borrowed her best nylons when you go out on a special date. And, as JENNIE McEWEN said, it’s no problem at all to become very fond of Liz and she would if only Liz didn’t hog the telephone all the time and wasn’t always leaving things like horse saddles around. “I’m fed up with tripping over them and falling flat on my face,” said Jennie.

Well, as Liz said, what’s a lovely elder sister for if not to tidy the place up occasionally ?

Mystery Girl

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J.B.Fullarton

I recently received this message from Sprocketman. What do you all think?

Message: I was recently looking through some old mags. I seem to remember last year(?) while discussing JBF that someone wondered if he had only worked for ToCo. So, I was perusing a copy of Strip Lingerie No 43 and I spotted a shot of a young lady starting to disrobe in front of a massive fireplace complete with tiled arch. Looks familiar to me, as does the jazzy wallpaper on the chimney breast wall. The clincher for me was the appearance stage left of the arm of a chair in a familiar check pattern. I’ve lost count of the number of young ladies we’ve seen in front of or on that suite, let’s just mention Julie Scott, Margo Hamilton, Rita Lees and Sadie Milligan to name but a few. There is another shot later in the mag where the chair is more evident and the model more visible, but I still can’t recognise her. I suppose with quite a stretch of imagination she could be Sadie Milligan, but I remain to be convinced.
Any further input from anyone?
Sprocketman.


Picture Set Sales

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Picture Set Sales

I have dozens and dozens of picture sets that I acquired some years ago when purchasing a job lot of books. They have been sitting in my store room since then. But I am having a clear-out and they need to find new homes. They are all of a reasonable quality.

I have priced them to sell and will add more sets as I get the time.

See what you think.

Diana Reed

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We Never Had A Lodger Like This

We’ve had lodgers we didn’t even know about until they started leaving notes complaining about the motor in the fridge, and we’ve had lodgers whom we’ve had to way lay on the stairs and speak sternly to about getting their hair cut.

We’ve never had a lodger like DIANA REED. We suppose we must have done something that made us undeserving of same. Diana has a cute apartment in London, and with her experience of interior decorating her own flair here is for the unconventional contemporary (whatever that is)—she naturally keeps the whole thing looking dizzy.

Diana also likes cultivating rare potted plants and keeps tropical fish.

Some of the lodgers we’ve had would have eaten both.

Just a lot of dull, dim savages, mate?

Sheila Burns and Adrienne Ross

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Yes But

SHEILA BURNS and ADRIENNE ROSS agree that longs are warmer, but are they smarter?

Smarter than what! Than modern brevity. And how about the look of it all when they’re jiving! Passed to you, Claude.

It’s Sheila on the left, Adrienne on the right. Anything else we aren’t sure about. But your opinion is as good as the next guy’s.